Synthesizing Life

At the beginning of this unit I was confused about the term “synthesis”. I had never really heard it before, or maybe I did, but didn’t know what it meant so I just breezed over it. I came to learn the word to mean connecting two pieces of literature in a way that not only compares, but explains the significance of the comparison. Later we learned, we could relate an article with a video. Pretty cool. But last week I learned I could relate an article, or video, with my life. I began to synthesis the passing of my grandmother with the passing of Frank’s dad, even though that was never an assignment. I saw things differently and used Frank’s struggle with identity after the loss of his parents to help me with my own personal struggles. I’ve never met Frank Snake Church, but if I did tomorrow, I would thank him for helping me cope with my current family situation.

To be honest, I was getting annoyed at the beginning of the unit with the kernel essays. It crossed my mind to drop out of college once or twice. But, when it came time to write the final paper, it became so clear why we did all the kernel essays. I would say writing those were the most helpful in preparing me for the turning in of my synthesis paper. Without those I feel like I would have been lost on where to even start my paper.

I didn’t really have a writing partner due to being absent from class, but I used Alexie as a writing partner and reviewed his work to better mine. When Alexie became too silent (get it? because books can’t talk), Kaitlin helped me a lot in the peer review. I feel she wasn’t totally harsh enough however, which was good for my self esteem, but I’m not sure as good for my paper. Also, having a teacher that cared enough to go on my google doc and make comments and help me better my paper meant the world to me. I loved being reassured I was on the right path, but being pushed to dig a little deeper.

Take aways? Assignments have value that you may not see right away, but will reveal themselves eventually. The power of peer editing is something not to be taken lightly as it could lead to something wonderful. Turns out that what we learn in college, really does have real life appeal. Don’t take anything for granted. Remember to tell your loved ones you love them, no matter how much you think they already know, because you never know when you won’t be able to anymore. But some of these may not be writing related…..

Ironic, Isn’t It?

Death provides an interesting insight into a new perspective of life. On one hand, you are devastated and crushed by the loss of a loved one, but on the other it is somewhat of a relief to know that one day the pain and suffering will end.  Burying my grandmother today was a whirlwind of emotions. I want so badly to be angry and upset with God, but scripture and Christian music are the only things keeping me sane as of now. Ironic, isn’t it? My grandmother had a disease in which the veins in her legs were unable to pump the blood back up to her heart which resulted in blood pooling in her legs. This led to sores that eventually became infectious. The medicine she took for the sores made her extremely sick, and the medicine she took for the sickness made her kidney fail, and the medicine she took for her kidney made her lungs close up, and the cycle continued. Ever think medicine has advanced too much for our own good? Ironic, isn’t it? A long, sad story short: my grandmother was on life support and given only a few hours to live, but her heart was so strong she made it 36 hours before we saw her heart rate hit zero. My dad says she knew what she was doing, and simply did not want to pick between my sister (a UA grad) and me this weekend during the Ole Miss – Alabama game. My dad always knows the right things to say. It’s hard to think about her not being there for my college graduation or my wedding or anything like that, but I know it’s selfish for those to be the things on my mind. Between the tears today at the graveside service, I saw my grandfather’s tombstone for the first time in 10 years. I think it is kind of morbid to visit cemeteries, and thus never went to visit him after his burial in 2006. As heart wrenching as it was to see Granny in a box, there was also a sense of peace that rushed over me when I got to see my grandparents side by side again. Ironic, isn’t it? I am positive I could use a 15 letter word to describe how I am feeling, but nothing seems as appropriate as sad. Just plain sad. When you die, you don’t get to take anything with you. So everything tangible she worked for for the past 71 years disappears. However, even though she is gone, I know she has touched my heart in a way that will last forever and thus makes her immortal. So maybe the only point of living is to impact the lives of others before you die. Ironic, isn’t it?