After reflecting on the year as a whole, I realized how my Ole Miss experiences have differed from those of my high school years. More importantly, I have seen an increased amount of personal growth in myself than I have in high school. In fact, I feel that I have become a more independent learner and person compared to high school.
Take a look at my Weekly Artifact: NEVER LOFT YOUR BED ALONE . My head got ahead of my capabilities and there wasn’t a soul there to talk me out of it. I made up a list of why would it be a good idea to loft my bed rather than why it is not a good idea to loft my bed. When I look back on this moment, all I can think is “Only Madelyn Moments”. This simple example demonstrates how I have begun to think independently about life decisions. Although I think this was a huge learning moment for my personal life, I believe that this is dramatically different from how I would have acted in high school. During those four short years of my life, I had to have permission from my parents before I did something. This prevented me from making the bad decision or not thinking something through entirely. In college, I don’t have to have parental consent. If you had asked me a year ago if I would decide to do something without asking my parents first, I would laugh in your face. Now I am making all kinds of decisions on my own, whether it be about personal matters such as what I am going to eat for lunch to educational decisions about doing my homework. Therefore, I believe that through out my first year at Ole Miss, I have become more of an actively independent person in my life actions.
My independent thinking was not limited to the personal life experiences. In my educational opportunities, I have become more independent than my high school self. If you consider my Weekly Artifact: Math Master , it becomes more clear how I have begun to have to think and learn independently. This post highlights how I have developed many perspectives on how to solve a math problem. I was presented with a problem from a class I have never taken and was able to solve it because of what I have learned from another math course. In high school, I can guarantee that if I was presented with a problem like that, I would have gone straight to the teacher and they would have showed me how to solve it. Absolutely no outside problem solving. I think this example really goes to show how I have begun to further my knowledge and be less dependent on a teacher spoon feeding me the information. This idea of independent problem solving becoming one of my strengths in college is evident in other classes as well. I believe that this really demonstrates who this one skill is not only new, but one that can help me in life and other educational obstacles.
In my Classroom Ideas post, I mentioned how I hated group projects. What I have realized during my first year in college is that I absolutely hate having to rely on other people doing work that will affect my grade. I guess this labels me not only as a person comfortable with doing things independently (even if it means more work on my behalf), but it also classifies me as a control freak. I am a perfectionist and have come to the conclusion that I work better by myself than with other people. In high school, I absolutely dreaded independent projects. Anytime I had the opportunity to work with my friends, I did it. I believe that my high school self would also rely on other people to do the work for me. I absolutely hated research, writing/composing the final project. Oh my how times have changed through out this first year at Ole Miss. I think a lot of this stems from the fact that I was a very lazy learner and relied on people more than I did on myself. I also believe this demonstrates how I have grown as an individual with one year of being out of high school.
So what changed within this last year that made me such an independent person? I believe that my attitude towards my grades and reputation in college is way more important than it was in high school. During grade school, your grades were important to your teachers’ reputations, thus your grade was a reflection of how the teacher wanted to be represented. At Ole Miss, your grades represent nothing more but yourself and your work ethic. I truly realized this when I posted my Weekly Artifact: History or Theology . I talked about how in my history class I read a book that paralleled and contradicted beliefs/parts of the Bible. As I was commenting, I realized that not only did I view myself as an independent learner, but I learned how to conform to be independently different from class to class. Since my teacher was a nonbeliever, I had to conform my personal thoughts into a manner that the opposing viewpoint would at least respect. I think this post and comment really demonstrates how college has uniquely shaped me into the learner I am today. In high school, I would have easily just written the paper or assignment in the exact manner that my teacher would want, even if this meant putting my personal beliefs aside. With this new concept of my grades representing me, I want them to be the best they can be which required me to learn how to individualize my courses.
I think on a much larger scale, being independent from parental control, high school “babying” and collaborative work has better prepared me for future classes and moments in my career. This first year of college has been nothing more than a “trial-and-error” year. I have made the spontaneous decisions and learned. I have been presented with a problem without teacher assistance and learned. I have failed many assignments across all my courses and learned. Time and time again, I have begun to develop into a well rounded learner who does more than copies down notes, regurgitates it on tests and assignments, then forgets about it. With each experience in college, I realized how independent of a student and individual I have become compared to the high school version I once was.
