Monthly Archives: March 2016
Revised Intro : Jasmine
Intro, First Draft:
Tuition has increased at a rate higher than inflation for 30 years, and the end result is higher student debt and an entire generation at a loss as to how they will pay off their loans. The average cost of tuition across the United States has been rising faster than inflation for the last three decades (Campos). Over the years, numerous researchers have suggested causes and solutions to stop rising tuition. These researchers want Americans to believe tuition is growing, because of increasing administration and lowering state funds each year. Living in America, an education is a given privilege. However, in America, minorities are not given a fair education, because they can’t afford the rising costs. Minorities have higher debt rates, and lower degree counts in higher education. More should be done to ensure all Americans get an equal education.
Intro (Revised Draft after class feedback):
Tuition has increased at a rate higher than inflation for 30 years, and the end result is higher student debt and an entire generation at a loss as to how they will pay off their loans (Campos). According to a report by the Delta Cost Project, tuition for a public four-year institution in 1970 was $358 per semester. If tuition had grown in pace with inflation, the average tuition at public colleges would have been $2,052 in 2010. Instead, the average per semester tuition at public colleges and universities was $6,695 in 2010 (Clark). For the 2012–13 academic year, annual current dollar prices for tuition, room, and board were estimated to be $15,022 at public institutions, and $39,173 at private nonprofit institutions. Between 2002–03 and 2012–13, prices for tuition, room, and board at public institutions rose 39 percent, and prices at private nonprofit institutions rose 27 percent, after adjustment for inflation. Over the years, numerous researchers have suggested causes and solutions to stop rising tuition. These researchers want Americans to believe tuition is growing, because of increasing administration and lowering state funds each year. Living in America, a college education should be a given privilege. However, in America, minorities are not given a fair education, because they can’t afford the rising costs. Minorities have higher debt rates, and lower degree counts in higher education. More should be done to ensure all Americans get an equal education.
Many ethnicities are affected by rising tuition. Not surprisingly, minorities are most effected. Following rising tuition came an unbearable amount of student debt, an increase in student loan takeout, and an increasing list of reasons for increasing spikes. In addition, minorities have multiple struggles. Minorities are faced with managing increasing tuition rates, and as a result, minorities have a lower number of higher education degrees, because they cannot afford the rising cost.
Drafting Intro
America is traditionally considered a safe place; however, many Americans live in constant fear of violence, particularly gun violence, within their own communities. Since the year of 2012, Chicago has become a national symbol of gun violence (Atkins 2015). Because of all the acts of violence and the number of murders in the city, Chicago is also called “Chiraq.” The name “Chiraq” was given to Chicago because walking the streets of Chicago is like walking through Iraq. So many innocent people are losing their lives every day due to senseless gun violence. Chicago has become a war zone, and it is out of control. Many people attribute this to strained relationships between the local communities and law enforcement, but many of these acts of violence can be traced to other factors in different communities including lack of education, unstable income, and poverty. Not all of Chicago is dangerous; there are some neighborhoods and communities that suffer most and need more attention.
My Writing Rules
As a student, I was taught to write the five-paragraph essay in my earliest years of academic writing (I’d say it started around middle school and lasted until my junior year of high school). We would have to offer up three points for our thesis statement, and then we would make sure the three body paragraphs aligned with our three points. We’d write a weak conclusion that was basically a word-for-word retelling of our intro. I remember that it was the start of hating academic writing and loving creative writing for me.
Thankfully, a woman named Joyce Helmick and a man named George Wilson together broke this mold for me. In my AP History class, Mr. Wilson taught us to be open to creativity in academic writing. To always consider audience and purpose of every assignment. Mrs. Helmick taught me to be flexible to the genre of each assignment. She felt it was a skill one needed to master to understand the difference between a persuasive essay, a poem, a researched thesis, a short story, etc. No genre was above another one; it’s up to us to be able to have the talent to approach each assignment for what it is…not what the last paper was.
As a writing teacher, my writing rules consist of the following (and I’m sure there are many more):
- Appreciate the parameters of each assignment. You will not always like every type of paper, but having the stamina and skill to approach every writing project is good training for life.
- Always consider audience before approaching an assignment. That’s how you’ll find your writing voice. Don’t expect it to be the same for every assignment.
- Teachers have to post word count minimums. Believe me, we wish we didn’t have to. But, if we don’t, some students mistake that for not needing to explore the assignment fully. But, even if you see a word count, try to ignore it. Just write. Most of the time, if you are truly fulfilling the assignment, word count will not be an issue.
- Always engage your reader.
- Don’t forget the rhetorical triangle. We don’t discuss it just to analyze stuff in Writing 101. We discuss it because it is the cornerstone to good writing across the board. How do you build your own credibility in your work? How are you supporting your claims with strong logical evidence? How are you engaging your reader’s passion and emotion for your topic?
- How will you BEST serve your topic? In an academic argument, your topic is BEST served by remaining objective. Remember, it’s about the parameters of the assignment, the genre. You want to consider that when making writing decisions.
- Inquiry is key. If you don’t care about your topic, it will be very apparent in your writing. Caring counts.
Causal Argument Intro
Tuition has increased at a rate higher than inflation for 30 years, and the end result is higher student debt and an entire generation at a loss as to how they will pay off their loans. The average cost of tuition across the United States has been rising faster than inflation for the last three decades (Campos). Over the years, numerous researchers have suggested causes and solutions to stop rising tuition. These researchers want Americans to believe tuition is growing, because of increasing administration and lowering state funds each year. Living in America, an education is a given privilege. However, in America, minorities are not given a fair education, because they can’t afford the rising costs. Minorities have higher debt rates, and lower degree counts in higher education. More should be done to ensure all Americans get an equal education.
Leia says, “Seven More Weeks Until Semester’s End…the Force be With You.”
Casual Argument Proposal Draft
At the start of my research, I asked the question, “Why do so many Americans develop pessimistic perceptions of crime in America despite what actual crime statistics show?” I believe this is a prevalent question to ask considering the widespread news coverage of police officers being involved in the shootings and killings of unarmed, often African American, teenagers. This detrimental view of crime portrayed by the media paints negative perceptions of police officers, racial groups, and crime. Such tragic incidents also justify why some people blame guns and the “lack of gun control” for the crime rate in America, sparking a conflicting battle between American citizens who strive to see more regulations regarding gun laws and those who are angered by the thought of their right to bear arms being taken away. My research suggests that the crime rate in America has been declining over the past two decades; however, the depiction of crime portrayed by the media increases negative public perceptions of crime by Americans.
For my casual argument, I plan to observe the casual relationship between the crime rate in America as well as the percentage of Americans believing crime has increased since previous years. Data obtained from the FBI and composed into the Uniform Crime Report shows that America experienced it’s highest rate of reported violent crimes in 1992 (1,932,274) but has sense been on a steady decline (in 2014, the number of reported crimes was 1,165,3838). However, A 2015 Gallup poll showed that 70% of Americans believe that the crime rate in America has increased since the year before.
Causal Argument Proposal Draft
At the start of my research, I asked the question, “Why are kids being bullied?” I believe this is a prevalent issue as we see a increased number of children being bullied in the United States. Actions such as bullying make children feel unsafe and scared at school which leads to withdraw from school and people. My research has led me to believe that across the United States children are being bullied and school authorities just let it happen because “kids are just being kids”. The lack of redirection of this problem from school faculty and officials is alarming and my research suggests that this could have a huge impact in a child’s mental health and future.
For my causal argument, I plan to explore the causal relationship between the bullying at school, and teen suicide rates. Some studies conducted in my research found that children being bullied suffer from higher rates of depression and suicide than children that aren’t being bullied. I plan to address how bullied can lead to attempted suicides and suicides. I plan to mention the effects bullying has on all victims of abuse but in my causal argument, I plan to focus specifically on how the lack of intervention in bully cases can lead to an increase in teen suicides. My working thesis at this point is this:
Living in America, the land of freedom, as a child that is been bullied at school seems like a never ending terror. Instead, many children will think of ending their lives and have a high rate of attempting or committing suicide due to the lack of intervention to stop this problem.
Causal Argument Proposal Draft
Many researcher have tried to explain why young women living in poverty are more likely to have kids in their teens, and have concluded that growing up with few economic prospects can lead young women to choose teen parenting. The cycle of poverty is a controversial topic in today’s society and have many contributing factors. Focusing mainly on the connection of teen pregnancy and poverty is more controversial because these are two enlightened topics that causes many problems in our growing world. Studies reveal many different factors for this (include factors found in research). . . Impoverished teens, however, do not always feel motivated to work toward future planning because they have a poor sense of self-efficacy, and because of this, they may not see the importance of avoiding pregnancy.
Daily Write 3/7
KD told me that i really needed to add a couple sentences, because I was not doing a good job comparing the sources. I also wasn’t doing a good job reflecting which is a major part of this project. I still have a lot of work to do.